your hair is like a flock of goats

The interconfessional Chichewa translation (publ. 1999) uses the ideophone pekupeku in Song of Songs 4:1 to describe the ripples and tumbles of the hair (“Your hair ripples and tumbles like a flock of goats”). Pekupeku is generally used for a swaying, bouncing, and flapping motion and here evokes the flowing and lively movement of hair down the slopes. (Source: Ernst Wendland)

Ideophones are a class of sound symbolic words expressing human sensation that are used as literary devices in many African languages. (Source: Philip Noss)

complete verse (Song of Solomon 6:5)

Following are a number of back-translations as well as a sample translation for translators of Song of Solomon 6:5:

  • Kupsabiny: “Yes! Please look to the side (look away),
    or your eyes pierce/spear me.
    Your hair flows like a group of goats
    who are coming down from the hills of Gilead.” (Source: Kupsabiny Back Translation)
  • Newari: “Turn your eyes away from me,
    they overwhelm me.
    Your hair dances like a flock of goats
    bounding down the hills of Gilead.” (Source: Newari Back Translation)
  • Hiligaynon: “Do- not -look-at me for I am-about-to be-overwhelmed/[Lit. something-will-happen to me] by you (sing.). Your (sing.) head-hair (is) just like a flock/[lit. animal-grouping] of goats that are-coming-down from the Mountain of Gilead.” (Source: Hiligaynon Back Translation)
  • English: “Quit looking at me like that,
    because your eyes excite me very much.
    Your long black hair moves from side to side like a flock of black goats
    moving down the slopes of Gilead Mountain.” (Source: Translation for Translators)

goat

The Hebrew and Greek that is translated as “goat” in English is translated in Cherokee as ahwi dinihanulvhi or “bearded deer.” (source: Bender / Belt 2025, p. 18)

please (adverb / Japanese honorifics)

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Like a number of other East Asian languages, Japanese uses a complex system of honorifics, i.e. a system where a number of different levels of politeness are expressed in language via words, word forms or grammatical constructs. These can range from addressing someone or referring to someone with contempt (very informal) to expressing the highest level of reference (as used in addressing or referring to God) or any number of levels in-between. One way to do this is through the usage (or a lack) of an honorific prefix as shown here in the widely-used Japanese Shinkaiyaku (新改訳) Bible of 2017.

The concept of “please” is translated in the Shinkaiyaku Bible as o-kure (おくれ) with the respectful prefix o-. (Source: S. E. Doi, see also S. E. Doi in Journal of Translation, 18/2022, p. 37ff. )

Translation commentary on Song of Songs 6:5

It is not only the woman’s overall beauty that sets the man’s heart beating wildly; her eyes also have that same kind of power over him.

Turn away your eyes from me begins with an imperative. The young man begs his lover to look away from him. Looking away can have several different meanings. People turn their eyes away because of shyness, shame, disgust, sadness, or even anger. We must be sure we understand what the young man is asking. In this context her eyes hold some power over him. His meaning is that, if she is facing him, he can see her enticing eyes; if she looks away from him, then he is no longer under their spell. We must also be sure we understand what this movement of the eyes means for the readers of our translation. If a literal rendering will be misunderstood, a substitute can be used. We may need to express the idea with a negative, “Don’t look at me like that!” or “Stop looking at me that way!”

For they disturb me is introduced by the relative marker in Hebrew. Revised Standard Version and many other versions render that marker with a conjunction for, indicating that this is the reason he wants her to turn her eyes away. Good News Translation and New International Version do not translate it but rather divide the clauses into two independent sentences. In English and other languages this may be an acceptable solution.

The pronoun they is masculine plural, whereas the word eyes in Hebrew is normally feminine. Though it is difficult to explain this unusual grammar, it does not need to affect our translation. It is often the case that grammatical rules of agreement are abandoned, especially in poetry. As for the verb disturb, we note that this Hebrew root means “to frighten.” Since the young man is hardly afraid of his lover, the word must have a more positive sense here. New English Bible suggests “dazzle,” and Jerusalem Bible “captivate me,” while New American Bible uses “torment.” Whether her eyes excite him sexually or more generally cannot be finally answered. What is certain is that her eyes have an unsettling effect upon him. We can also say “they overwhelm me” (New Revised Standard Version), or even perhaps “they’re driving me crazy!”

Good News Translation “turn your eyes away from me; they are holding me captive” is an acceptable model, or “Don’t look at me like that; I cannot resist you.” In some languages it may be more natural to put the reason clause before the imperative; so we can also say “Your eyes are driving me crazy. Stop looking at me that way!”

Your hair is like a flock of goats, moving down the slopes of Gilead: for comments and translation, refer to 4.1.

Quoted with permission from Ogden, Graham S. and Zogbo, Lynell. A Handbook on the Book of Song of Songs. (UBS Helps for Translators). New York: UBS, 1998. For this and other handbooks for translators see here .

SIL Translator’s Notes on Song of Songs 6:5

6:5a–b

Turn your eyes away from me, for they have overcome me: In the Song the man often referred to the woman’s eyes (1:15; 4:1; 4:9; 6:5; 7:4). Here he asked the woman not to look directly into his eyes, because that made him feel confused. The sentence is more literally, “Turn your eyes from me which they confuse me.” Her beautiful eyes delighted him, but he could not see their beauty and still think clearly. However, he did not really want her to turn away.

Some other ways to translate 6:5a–b are:

Turn your eyes from me, because they excite me too much. (New Century Version)
-or-
Turn your eyes away from me—I am overcome when you gaze at me!

In some cultures people may not understand the reason for the man’s request. They may think that the woman tried to use spiritual power to enchant him. If that is true in your culture, you should translate in a different way that will not imply that wrong meaning. Other ways to translate it are:

• Add implied information to make the meaning clear. For example:

Your eyes confuse me ⌊with their beauty⌋. Turn them aside ⌊so I can think clearly⌋ !

• Use a saying or figure of speech that has the same meaning in your own language.

Turn your eyes away from me: This clause implies that the woman was looking directly into the man’s eyes. He asked her not to gaze into his eyes, but at the same time, he did not really want her to look away. He implied that when she looked at him like that, he felt weak from love and desire.

In some languages there may be a special way to express this meaning. In other languages there may be a figure of speech to translate it. Translate the meaning in a natural way that will fit this context in your culture.

for they have overcome me: The phrase they have overcome me is similar to the phrase “You have captured my heart” in 4:9. In 4:9 the man felt helpless, but he also felt pleasure. Here in 6:5 the meaning is similar, but his feeling when he looked into her eyes was even stronger. Some other ways to translate it are:

they overwhelm me! (New Revised Standard Version)
-or-
they are holding me captive. (Good News Translation)
-or-
they overpower me. (New Living Translation (2004))

6:5c–d

Your hair is like a flock of goats streaming down from Gilead: The comparison here is identical to the one in 4:1d–e. Translate it in the same way here. For more information, see the notes on 4:1d–e.

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