A new paragraph should be started here as the author begins a sequence of events narrated in the following parallel structure: “and + [noun] + verb + [object].” The passage begins this way. The translator’s challenge is to link these brief statements into an effective series. Revised Standard Version, for instance, begins the first two with When. Other approaches are possible. Here are the statements:

And the foreigners — lifted up their eyes
and they — saw them coming against them
and they — left camp to battle
and Judas’ men — sounded trumpets
and they — met in battle
and the Gentiles — were crushed
and they — fled into the plain
and all stragglers — fell to the sword
and they — pursued them

When the foreigners looked up and saw them coming against them: Looked up (literally “lifted up their eyes”) is a Hebrew idiom that will be natural in some languages, but it does not need to be expressed in many others. The first pronoun them refers to Judas and his men. Saw them coming against them is closer to the text than Good News Bible‘s rendering, which is “saw Judas and his men preparing for battle.” An alternative model for verse 12 is “When the Gentiles saw Judas and his men coming toward them.”

They went forth from their camp to battle may be rendered “they moved out of their camp to fight [the Israelites].”

Contemporary English Version reorders the clauses in verses 12-13a as follows: “12~The Jewish troops started toward the Gentiles, who saw them coming 13~and went out to fight.” We may also translate “12~Judas and his soldiers started walking toward the Gentiles, who saw them coming 13~and came out of their camp to fight.”

Then the men with Judas blew their trumpets and engaged in battle may be rendered “Then Judas and his soldiers blew [or, sounded] their trumpets and the two sides attacked each other.” For trumpets see 1Macc 3.54.

The Gentiles were crushed and fled into the plain may be expressed as “The Gentile soldiers were routed [or, totally defeated] and fled [or, retreated] toward the plain.”

And all those in the rear fell by the sword may be rendered “All those who could not keep up [or, escape] were killed.”

They pursued them to Gazara, and to the plains of Idumea, and to Azotus and Jamnia: It is of course the Jews who pursued the Syrians. Idumea was a region (see the comments on 1Macc 3.41); Gazara, Azotus, and Jamnia were towns. Good News Bible renders Gazara as “Gezer,” the form of the town’s name in the Hebrew Old Testament. Gezer was halfway between Jerusalem and the Mediterranean coast (about 30 kilometers, or 18.5 miles). Azotus is known as Ashdod in the Hebrew Old Testament. It was south of Jamnia. Both Azotus and Jamnia were on the Mediterranean coast. The movement of pursuit could be rendered in this way: “Judas’ men pursued the Syrian soldiers past the town of Gezer and across the plains of Idumea as far as the [coastal] towns of Jamnia and Azotus” or “… as far as the towns of Jamnia and Azotus by the sea.”

And three thousand of them fell: This refers to Syrian casualties, not Jewish ones. Good News Bible provides a helpful model here with “Altogether they killed about 3,000 of the enemy,” or we may say “That day they killed about 3,000 [or, three thousand] of the enemy soldiers.”

An alternative model for verses 12-15 is:

• 12~The Gentile [or, foreign soldiers] saw the Jews [or, Judas and his men] advancing [or, coming] toward them, 13~and came out of their camp ready to fight them. Then Judas’ men sounded their trumpets 14~and the two sides attacked each other. The Jews defeated the Syrians and they retreated toward the plain, 15~where those who could not keep up [or, escape] were killed. Judas and his men pursued [or, chased] the Syrians past the town of Gezer and across the plains of Idumea as far as the [coastal] towns of Jamnia and Azotus. That day they killed about 3,000 [or, three thousand] of the enemy soldiers.

Quoted with permission from Bullard, Roger A. and Hatton, Howard A. A Handbook on 1-2 Maccabees. (UBS Helps for Translators). New York: UBS, 2011. For this and other handbooks for translators see here.