Translation commentary on Baruch 3:21

Their sons is better interpreted as “Their children” (Good News Translation), or even better, “Their descendants” (New Revised Standard Version).

There is a better way of structuring this verse and the last line of verse 20 than the way taken by Revised Standard Version and Good News Translation. It involves nothing more than revising the punctuation of the Greek text. It would read as follows:

• … Neither have their descendants reached her [laid hold of her]; they have strayed far from her paths.

If we were to restructure the Good News Translation text to reflect this, it would read:

• … They did not find the path to Wisdom. Their children also failed to reach her.

There is a problem with the word her in this verse, because the Greek text reads “their” (Revised Standard Version footnote). There are three possibilities:
(a) Change the text with the Syriac version to read “her,” which most scholars and most versions do. The reference would, of course, be to Wisdom.
(b) Translate “their,” with the meaning “they have strayed far from their [own] paths, the place where they should be.” Compare the use of “his way” in Job 17.9 and “your way” in Pro 5.8. This interpretation makes the most conservative use of the Greek text and is quite reasonable. Translators are urged to consider it.
(c) Translate “their ancestors,” with the meaning “they have strayed far from the ways of their ancestors” (Traduction œcuménique de la Bible).

If translators were to take the restructuring suggested above and alter it to agree with the second of these interpretations, it could read:

• … Neither have their descendants reached her [laid hold of her]; they have strayed far from where they should be.

And again, if we were to restructure the Good News Translation text to reflect this, it would read:

• … They did not find the path to Wisdom. Their children also failed to reach the place they should have been.

Quoted with permission from Bullard, Roger A. and Hatton, Howard A. A Handbook on The Shorter Books of the Deuterocanon. (UBS Helps for Translators). New York: UBS, 2006. For this and other handbooks for translators see here.

Translation commentary on Baruch 4:16

These two verses refer back to Deut 28.49-50, but see also Jer 5.15.

A shameless nation, of a strange language: The Greek word translated shameless probably here has the meaning “ruthless” or “merciless.” So Contemporary English Version has “cruel.” See Hab 1.6-9. Of a strange language simply emphasizes that those who carried the Jews into exile were foreigners. Good News Translation keeps the term language with “a shameless nation that speaks a foreign language.” Contemporary English Version omits it, saying simply “a cruel and foreign nation.”

Who had no respect for an old man, and had no pity for a child: Good News Translation expresses this as “has no respect for the elderly and no pity for children,” and Contemporary English Version has “it had no pity on anyone, whether young or old.”

They led away the widow’s beloved sons, and bereaved the lonely woman of her daughters: Widow and lonely woman refer to Jerusalem after the exile had begun. Good News Translation begins verse 16 with “These people” (Contemporary English Version “That nation”) rather than They to avoid the possibility, however unlikely, that someone would mistake “the elderly” and “children” as the subject. Good News Translation also makes the discourse easier to follow by casting verse 16 in the first person, saying “These people carried off my beloved sons and took away my daughters….” (similarly Contemporary English Version).

Good News Translation “took away my daughters” misses the impact of bereaved. This could be restored with a slight change: “took my daughters away from me.” The two lines of verse 16 are of course parallel and could be combined easily, but leaving the two statements separate and parallel sounds more like a call for sympathy, which is what Jerusalem seeks (verse 14). A combined version might read like a dry statement of fact. Good News Translation has taken from the parallelism the words the widow’s and the lonely woman and made them a separate clause, saying “and I was left a widow, completely alone.” Contemporary English Version does it with “and now I am a lonely widow.” This effectively closes Jerusalem’s appeal to the neighbors by describing herself in such a way as to arouse their sympathy. Once more there is the possible problem of translating the mixed metaphor of a widow and a woman who has lost her children here (see the comments at verse 12).

Quoted with permission from Bullard, Roger A. and Hatton, Howard A. A Handbook on The Shorter Books of the Deuterocanon. (UBS Helps for Translators). New York: UBS, 2006. For this and other handbooks for translators see here.

Translation commentary on Letter of Jeremiah 1:2

The connector Therefore does not fit here since this verse does not describe the direct result of the previous verse. Translators would do well to omit it, following Good News Translation.

When you have come to Babylon you will remain there: This is reduced in Good News Translation to “You will remain there in exile.” This can be done because it is obvious where the Jews are going: after verses 1 and 2, Babylon as a destination does not need to be repeated. (Good News Translation will bring “Babylon” back in at the end of the verse where it seems less obtrusive.) And if they are going to remain there, they obviously have to get there. The only thing that may be missing from the abbreviated wording in Good News Translation is the sense of journeying to Babylon. That in itself was to be a difficult ordeal, and a translation such as New Jerusalem Bible conveys this by saying “Once you have reached Babylon you will stay there.” Good News Translation adds “in exile” to help the reader understand the historical situation, although this would hardly be needed by the original audience. So translators may say something like “Once you have reached Babylon you will remain there.”

Seven generations: Although forty years seems to be the length of a generation in Old Testament thinking, it is best not to translate this into exact numbers. On the one hand, we cannot be sure of that forty-year length, and on the other, we can be pretty sure that the author is being deliberately vague. Jeremiah had spoken of an exile of seventy years in Jer 25.12 and 29.10 (a figure of forty years is given in Ezek 4.6). The earliest exiles to return home departed about 60 years after the first group of captives had been taken to Babylonia, and there were other later groups making their way back in the late sixth century B.C. But 280 years (40 times 7) after the exile began, there were Jews not only in their historic homeland and in Babylonia, but all over much of the known world. In much of this area the warnings of this book to avoid the worship of idols would have been relevant. The reference here to seven generations is one reason that the year 317 B.C. (597 minus 280) is sometimes seen as possibly the year that this book was written, or at least as indicative of the general period of writing—the Greek period in Jewish history.

After that I will bring you away from there in peace: Here God speaks directly. Good News Translation and Contemporary English Version shift this to third person to avoid an awkward transition from the prophet’s words to God’s words and then back to the prophet’s. This difficulty occurs in verse 7 also. Bring you … in peace may not be adequately represented by “lead you peacefully home” (Good News Translation). Peace certainly represents the Hebrew word shalom, which means “peace, prosperity, health, well-being, all good things” (see Bar 3.13). However, Good News Translation is only saying that the people will return home without any armed conflict along the way. This is one aspect of the meaning, of course, but New English Bible appropriately adds another aspect, saying “lead you … in peace and prosperity.” The meaning is close to “send you home with renewed hopes, happy and optimistic.” “Lead you safely home” might convey the idea a bit better than “lead you peacefully home.”

Quoted with permission from Bullard, Roger A. and Hatton, Howard A. A Handbook on The Shorter Books of the Deuterocanon. (UBS Helps for Translators). New York: UBS, 2006. For this and other handbooks for translators see here.

Translation commentary on Letter of Jeremiah 1:34

In verses 35-38 every verb indicating what these gods cannot do is negated with emphasis. These verbal expressions are not able to give, will not require, “cannot save … or rescue,” “cannot restore,” “cannot rescue,” and “cannot take pity.”

They are not able to give either wealth or money: Wealth or money is literally “wealth or bronze/copper.” The meaning seems to be that these gods cannot make anyone rich; indeed, they can’t bestow any money at all.

If one makes a vow to them: A vow refers to a strong promise usually made to a god.

They will not require it: Good News Translation has “they will never make him pay,” but the word “pay” may be misleading; it suggests the vow had something to do with money. Even though money is mentioned in the first part of this verse, it is not demanded by the sense in the last half of this verse, which is only “If anyone makes a vow to them and does not keep it, they can never force him to do it.”

An alternative translation model for this verse is:

• These gods cannot make people rich. If someone makes a vow to them and does not keep it, they can never force him to do it.

Quoted with permission from Bullard, Roger A. and Hatton, Howard A. A Handbook on The Shorter Books of the Deuterocanon. (UBS Helps for Translators). New York: UBS, 2006. For this and other handbooks for translators see here.

Translation commentary on Letter of Jeremiah 1:66

They cannot show signs in the heavens and among the nations: Revised Standard Version has stumbled over the Greek here. As its footnote indicates, it has inserted and, but it has also reversed the order of the words connected by and. The Greek reads “And signs in the nations in heaven they will not show.” The Greek is certainly odd, but most scholars agree that the text does not need to be changed, and that “in the nations” has the meaning “for the nations,” that is, the gods cannot provide heavenly signs for the guidance of nations or peoples. New Revised Standard Version now reads “they cannot show signs in the heavens for the nations.” Another way to say this is “they cannot show signs in the sky to lead [or, guide] the nations.”

Shine like the sun or give light like the moon: In some languages it will be possible to use two separate verbs as in Revised Standard Version; namely, “the sun shines” and “the moon gives light.” In other languages, however, translators may combine the two as Good News Translation has done with the one verb “shine” (also Contemporary English Version).

Quoted with permission from Bullard, Roger A. and Hatton, Howard A. A Handbook on The Shorter Books of the Deuterocanon. (UBS Helps for Translators). New York: UBS, 2006. For this and other handbooks for translators see here.

Translation commentary on The Prayer of Azariah and the Song of the Three Young Men 1:28

If integrated into the book of Daniel: 3.51

Then the three, as with one mouth: As with one mouth means they were singing “together” (Good News Translation) or “with one voice” (New Revised Standard Version, New American Bible). New Jerusalem Bible has them singing “in unison,” that is, singing the same melody. This is rather technical and is not necessarily implied.

Praised and glorified and blessed God: The Greek does not specifically say they were singing, but since what follows is a hymn, singing is surely intended. Good News Translation “singing … in praise of God” pretty well encompasses the meaning of the three Greek verbs. However, the expression “in praise of God” will be awkward in some languages. “Praised God … singing” is a possible alternative.

Notice that Good News Translation moves the phrase “in the furnace” to the beginning of the sentence to avoid having the words “God” and “in the furnace” come together. It also adds the word “again” in the phrase “again started singing,” but this word should not be included.

Quoted with permission from Bullard, Roger A. and Hatton, Howard A. A Handbook on The Shorter Books of the Deuterocanon. (UBS Helps for Translators). New York: UBS, 2006. For this and other handbooks for translators see here.

Translation commentary on The Prayer of Azariah and the Song of the Three Young Men 1:61

If integrated into the book of Daniel: 3.83

Israel: Good News Translation makes it clear that it is the “people of Israel” who are addressed.

Quoted with permission from Bullard, Roger A. and Hatton, Howard A. A Handbook on The Shorter Books of the Deuterocanon. (UBS Helps for Translators). New York: UBS, 2006. For this and other handbooks for translators see here.

Translation commentary on Susanna 1:28

If integrated into the book of Daniel: 13.28.

The next day, when the people gathered at the house of her husband Joakim: Most translations, including Revised Standard Version and Good News Translation, start off this part of the narrative as if the people are gathering for everyday business (see verse 4), but news about Susanna had certainly gotten around. New Jerusalem Bible shows insight in the way this is introduced: “Next day a meeting was held at the house of her husband Joakim.” The reader deserves at least a hint that this is an unusual and purposeful gathering. The Greek says literally that the people came “to her husband Joakim”; the house is understood. In languages that do not have the passive voice, we may say “Next day, the Jewish people in Babylon met together at Joakim’s house.”

The two elders came: Instead of came, Good News Translation has “arrived” (also Contemporary English Version), which is a better choice of words. It implies anticipation, as if the gathering is waiting.

Full of their wicked plot is a difficult idiom in this literal translation. Its meaning is expressed in Good News Translation as “fully determined to carry out their wicked plan.” Contemporary English Version has “ready to go ahead with their terrible plans.”

To have Susanna put to death may be rendered “to cause Susanna to be executed,” or even “to have them execute Susanna.”

Quoted with permission from Bullard, Roger A. and Hatton, Howard A. A Handbook on The Shorter Books of the Deuterocanon. (UBS Helps for Translators). New York: UBS, 2006. For this and other handbooks for translators see here.