Translation commentary on Judith 10:9

Order the gate of the city to be opened for me may be rendered “Tell them to open the town gate for me.”

Accomplish the things about which you spoke with me: Good News Translation has Judith mention “what we were talking about.” The Greek puts the emphasis on whatever the men had said to Judith: the things about which you spoke with me. Maybe Judith is modestly referring to the elders’ blessing on her in verse 8, specifically their mention of “your plans,” in which case “what we were talking about” (Good News Translation) may be misleading. Yet the reference could be back to the conversation in 8.32-35, in which case New Revised Standard Version‘s “things you have just said to me” may also be misleading. The main point here is that neither the elders in verse 8 nor Judith in this verse are speaking directly; no one is spelling anything out. The elders speak vaguely of “your plans” and Judith speaks vaguely of the things about which you spoke with me. The author is telling the reader: something is going on here, but you aren’t going to find out just yet. Judith knows. The elders know she knows, but they know nothing, and are not particularly sure they want to know. So Good News Translation puts it pretty well with “what we have talked about.” The reference is broad enough to include 8.32-35, where Judith states that God will rescue the city through her; it will also include 10.8.

They ordered the young men to open the gate for her, as she had said: The word gate (Good News Translation “gates”) is supplied by virtually every translation. It is only implied in Greek, so Moore has “they ordered the young men to open up for her.” However, in English a translation sounds strange without it. As she had said (more properly “asked”) is omitted by Good News Translation as redundant in the context.

Quoted with permission from Bullard, Roger A. and Hatton, Howard A. A Handbook on Judith. (UBS Helps for Translators). New York: UBS, 2001. For this and other handbooks for translators see here.

Translation commentary on Judith 11:19

I will lead you through the middle of Judea, till you come to Jerusalem: The interpretive question here is whether Judith is offering Holofernes her knowledge of Judean geography (“I will guide you through the central part of the land of Judea to Jerusalem”) or whether she means “I will lead you straight through Judah to Jerusalem.” Since Judith is offering Holofernes her services as a prophet rather than as a guide, the latter interpretation is probably better.

I will set your throne in the midst of it: Good News Translation‘s “I will crown you king” cannot be called wrong, but it is problematic in three ways:

(1) The Greek text does not really say that Holofernes is going to become king.
(2) It implies that Judith will play a formal and public role in the installation of the king.
(3) Nothing is said about a crown, which is an anachronism.

The Greek says “I will set up your chariot,” or more specifically, “I will set up the floorboard of your chariot.” The floorboard of a chariot could be used as a place to sit by facing the rear. It could be used as a seat of authority (New American Bible “your judgment seat”). Several manuscripts read “throne” (New English Bible; New Jerusalem Bible “I will enthrone you”). This is surely an interpretation rather than the original text, but it is probably a correct interpretation. Judith does seem to be offering Holofernes kingship, as Good News Translation says. Further, Judith may well be portraying herself as one who, like Elijah, could choose and install kings. Of course we know Judith is lying here—she has no intention of doing this even if she could—but the idea of having an Israelite prophet install him as king would appeal to the general’s vanity. The problem becomes how to express it; one should avoid “crown.” I will set your throne is not bad, if the reader will not imagine Judith moving furniture around. One may also render it “I will publicly make you king [or, high chief], right there in the middle of the city!” Notice that Judith never mentions Nebuchadnezzar. It is Holofernes that she will make king, not Nebuchadnezzar.

You will lead them like sheep that have no shepherd, and not a dog will so much as open its mouth to growl at you: In using the images of sheep without a shepherd and the dogs not growling, Judith is using pictures from the Scriptures. The significance of them would be caught by the audience, but not by Holofernes. It is as if this scene were being presented on the stage, and when Judith speaks these words to Holofernes, she turns and winks at the audience. The image of sheep without a shepherd is found in Num 27.17 and 1 Kgs 22.17. It refers to people without a leader. In the latter passage the people are leaderless because the king has been killed. Judith is implying by this image, “You will lead them, all right—like any other dead king leads.” She is hinting at Holofernes’ own death. Holofernes would not hear this, of course. He hears only the promise of victory. This means that New Revised Standard Version‘s translation “drive them” or Good News Translation‘s “scatter the people” is more fitting than lead them.

The image of the dog derives from Exo 11.7. This passage gives a description of the morning after the Passover, when all the Egyptians lay dead, but the Israelites are so safe that not even a dog would growl at them. An alternative translation model for these two images is “You will drive [or, scatter] the people of Jerusalem [along] as if they were sheep that have no leader, and not even a dog will growl at you.”

For this has been told me, by my foreknowledge …: The connector For is not needed here. The sentence is a statement claiming that she was told these things beforehand by God. Good News Translation says what has to be said effectively and economically: “God has revealed these things to me in advance and has sent me to report them to you.”

Quoted with permission from Bullard, Roger A. and Hatton, Howard A. A Handbook on Judith. (UBS Helps for Translators). New York: UBS, 2001. For this and other handbooks for translators see here.

Translation commentary on Judith 13:9 - 13:10

She tumbled his body off the bed: Good News Translation has “She rolled his body off the bed.” As Enslin suggests, this certainly adds insult to injury. It probably also conjures up the image of Sisera lying dead in a pool of blood at Jael’s feet in Jdg 5.27.

Pulled down the canopy from the posts: For canopy and why Judith takes it, see the note on 10.21. The posts here are whatever was used to support the canopy. “Poles” or simply “supports” may be more likely.

After a moment she went out: For after a moment Good News Translation has “Then.” This is too weak. New Revised Standard Version‘s “Soon afterward” suggests that Judith stayed in Holofernes’ bedchamber awhile, perhaps regaining her composure; this is consistent with the Greek.

For food bag see 10.5.

Then the two of them went out together: Good News Translation‘s “Then the two women left together” is helpful. This is the proper place to begin a new paragraph, as most translations feel. The verse numbering will have to give way to logical blocking out of the material for paragraphing, or even, as in Good News Translation and Contemporary English Version, for a section heading.

As they were accustomed to go for prayer: Good News Translation has “as they always did when they went to pray.” One may want to consider expressing this “as they had been doing each night to pray” (see 12.7-9). Moore adds a nice touch here. He translates “The two of them then went out, as they always did, ‘to pray.’ ” He adds the quotation marks around “to pray” to indicate that this was not at all why they were going out this time, at any rate.

They passed through the camp and circled around the valley: Here Judith and her maid are reversing the journey they made away from the city in 10.10. See the note on the geography at that point. There is a difference in the description here. In 10.10 the women went straight through the valley. Here they circled around the valley. This is an important difference, which Good News Translation and Contemporary English Version ignore. In chapter 10 they went by a route where they were sure to be seen and taken prisoner. In this case they take a roundabout way, because they want to escape notice. No one in the Assyrian camp knows yet what has happened.

Came to its gates: “Approached the gates” would be better. In the next verse Judith calls out to the sentries while she is still some distance off. The Greek here does not say that the women actually got to the gates, only that they came toward the gates.

Quoted with permission from Bullard, Roger A. and Hatton, Howard A. A Handbook on Judith. (UBS Helps for Translators). New York: UBS, 2001. For this and other handbooks for translators see here.

Translation commentary on Judith 15:3

Those who had camped in the hills would be the Edomites and Ammonites of 7.18.

Took to flight: Good News Translation‘s “began to retreat” fits in well with the beginning of the Israelite attack in the next sentence.

Then the men of Israel … rushed out upon them: When the Assyrians were in general retreat, then the attack began. This could be made even clearer; for example, the whole verse may be translated “The soldiers who had camped on the hills around Bethulia began to retreat, and at that moment all the Israelite soldiers came charging down on them” or “At the very moment that the Assyrian soldiers who were camped on the hills around Bethulia began to retreat, all the Israelite soldiers came charging down on them.”

Quoted with permission from Bullard, Roger A. and Hatton, Howard A. A Handbook on Judith. (UBS Helps for Translators). New York: UBS, 2001. For this and other handbooks for translators see here.

Translation commentary on Judith 16:23 - 16:24

Good News Translation and Contemporary English Version join these two verses so as to bring the sentence about the distribution of her property before mention of her death. This arrangement is more logical and easier to follow.

She became more and more famous, and grew old in her husband’s house: Famous means that more and more people heard what she had done. So we may alternatively translate “More and more people heard about Judith’s great deed.” And expresses well the coordinate relationship between the two clauses here. Contemporary English Version expresses it with “Judith became more famous as time went by, and she continued to live in the house Manasseh had left her.”

She set her maid free: Good News Translation and Contemporary English Version put this clause in the same sentence with the distribution of property. However, it would be better as a separate sentence. The author certainly treats it as a separate item, and this nameless woman has been an important person in Judith’s life and in the story, as was described by the author at 8.10.

They buried her in the cave of her husband Manasseh: In the rocky countryside of Palestine the dead were often placed in caves rather than buried in the ground (see Gen 25.9). The principal point here is that Judith was laid to rest with the husband to whom she had been so faithful. Contemporary English Version‘s “in their family tomb” misses the important connection with the phrase “gathered to his people” mentioned in the previous verse. An alternative way to render this clause is “they buried her beside her husband Manasseh in his cave.”

The house of Israel mourned for her seven days: The house of Israel refers to “the people of Israel.” The phrase has the effect of speaking of them as a family. They are united in mourning a common loss. Mourned for her may be rendered “they wept showing sorrow for her.” Seven days was the normal period of mourning; see Sir 22.12.

To all those who were next of kin to her husband Manasseh, and to her own nearest kindred: Good News Translation has “among her husband’s and her own close relatives,” and Contemporary English Version “among her own closest relatives, as well as those of her husband.”

Quoted with permission from Bullard, Roger A. and Hatton, Howard A. A Handbook on Judith. (UBS Helps for Translators). New York: UBS, 2001. For this and other handbooks for translators see here.

Translation commentary on Judith 1:13

He led his forces against King Arphaxad: “Nebuchadnezzar” is inserted as subject by Good News Translation and Contemporary English Version. It is understood in the Greek, but it is a helpful repetition for the reader, especially if a new paragraph is begun with verse 13. Some translators will need to repeat information from verse 1; for example, “In the seventeenth year that King Nebuchadnezzar ruled over Assyria he….” Led his forces against … may be rendered “led his soldiers to fight against the soldiers of King Arphaxad.”

Defeated him in battle … overthrew the whole army: These two clauses may be combined; for example, “completely defeated Arphaxad’s soldiers, including….”

All his cavalry and all his chariots: All his cavalry means “all his soldiers riding horses.” Good News Translation reads “charioteers” instead of the literal chariots, since it is the men riding them who are defeated and not the equipment. However, chariots will need a descriptive phrase in some languages; for example, “war wagons/carts pulled by horses.” It may be necessary to express the final part of this sentence as follows:

• He completely defeated Arphaxad’s soldiers, including his soldiers on horses and his soldiers in war carts pulled by horses.

Quoted with permission from Bullard, Roger A. and Hatton, Howard A. A Handbook on Judith. (UBS Helps for Translators). New York: UBS, 2001. For this and other handbooks for translators see here.

Translation commentary on Judith 3:3

Behold, our buildings … lie before you: Behold will be rendered in some languages as “look” or “please take notice.” For wheat see 2.27. Our flocks and herds is rendered “our livestock” in both Good News Translation and Contemporary English Version. However, in some languages “our animals” will be a natural translation (compare 2.27). All our sheepfolds with their tents (literally “all the sheepfolds of our tents”) is better rendered in New Revised Standard Version as “all our encampments.” It refers to places where herders might make camp while seeing to the herds. Good News Translation‘s “our tents” is marginally acceptable, though the reference is not to the stuff the tents are made of. We suggest “all the camps of our herders [or, shepherds].” Lie before you is a shortened form of the same Greek expression “lie prostrate before you” in verse 2. Here lie before you is obviously figurative. All the possessions of the overrun towns are now offered to Holofernes as spoils of war. Good News Translation‘s “are at your disposal” is an effective equivalent. Contemporary English Version combines the last two clauses into “are yours.”

Quoted with permission from Bullard, Roger A. and Hatton, Howard A. A Handbook on Judith. (UBS Helps for Translators). New York: UBS, 2001. For this and other handbooks for translators see here.

Translation commentary on Judith 5:13

God dried up the Red Sea before them: Good News Translation has “their god dried up the Red Sea in front of them,” but in connection with its restructuring of 5.12b, this appears to say that it was the Egyptian god who dried up the Red Sea. It would be clearer to say “The God of these Israelites dried up….” In some languages the concept of dried up will be difficult to translate. In such cases we may follow Contemporary English Version with “The God of the Israelites then caused the Red Sea to open up, and the people walked safely through on dry land.” The Red Sea is the body of water lying between Africa and the Arabian Peninsula.

Quoted with permission from Bullard, Roger A. and Hatton, Howard A. A Handbook on Judith. (UBS Helps for Translators). New York: UBS, 2001. For this and other handbooks for translators see here.