Judith had told her maid to stand outside the bedchamber …: The translator’s problem here is that this verse is a flashback to earlier preparation for the evening which the narrator has not told us before. Good News Translation solves this problem by omitting reference to Judith telling the maid anything and simply saying, “Judith’s slave woman was waiting outside … Judith had also told Bagoas….” This is a good solution. It preserves the sense of stopped action without a jarring reference to something in the past. By having the maid “waiting outside” the reader does not have to shift points of view. The scene does not shift while we are told this; we are still inside the tent. We see Holofernes passed out on the bed, and Judith looking at him. We have been carefully made aware of two characters outside the tent, who will appear later on, without our being taken outside the tent to see them.

Revised Standard Version‘s use of the word bedchamber indicates that the maid was waiting outside the sleeping area (see 14.14) of Holofernes’ tent, but still within the tent. If she was outside the main tent, she would be under the scrutiny of guards and it would have been difficult later for Judith to transfer Holofernes’ head to her food bag. Good News Translation‘s translation gives the impression that the maid was waiting outside Judith’s tent. A model clearing up this problem is the following:

• Judith’s servant was waiting outside Holofernes’ sleeping quarters because Judith had asked her to wait there until the time for Judith to pray. Judith had also told Bagoas that she would be leaving the camp, just as she had done the past three nights.

Quoted with permission from Bullard, Roger A. and Hatton, Howard A. A Handbook on Judith. (UBS Helps for Translators). New York: UBS, 2001. For this and other handbooks for translators see here.