Let my lord now hear a word from the mouth of your servant: Good News Translation has Achior address Holofernes as “Sir,” which is defensible. Literally, he says my lord. The translator should seek some term that is appropriate for a subordinate to address one whom he recognizes as not only superior, but also regal; for example, “your Excellency” or the third person “my sovereign Lord [or, Master].” See also the end of Achior’s speech at 5.20. Achior also shows respect by identifying himself twice as your servant. This is missing in Good News Translation, but included once in Contemporary English Version where it is placed at the beginning of the speech: “Sir, I am your loyal servant. Please listen as I tell you about the people….” In a number of languages Revised Standard Version‘s respectful language will be natural and should be used. From the mouth of your servant is a Hebrew idiom for “from your servant.” Many translators will not want to use the word mouth.

I will tell you the truth … No falsehood …: In beginning his speech, Achior shows respect, submission, and tact, especially since he is going to tell Holofernes at some length something that he knows Holofernes will not want to hear. Though his words will be unwelcome, they will be the truth and have no falsehood. Compare Judith’s words to Holofernes in 11.5. Good News Translation keeps the noun truth and uses a verbal expression for no falsehood: “I will tell you the truth … I will not lie to you.” Contemporary English Version combines the two with “I will be completely honest.”

This people that dwells in the nearby mountain district: “These people who live in the mountains near your camp” (Good News Translation) is a good approach to a rather complicated Greek structure, although Revised Standard Version‘s rendering is also good. The literal reading is “this people who inhabits this mountain area, living near you.” The last phrase, “living near you,” obviously has reference to Holofernes’ camp.

Quoted with permission from Bullard, Roger A. and Hatton, Howard A. A Handbook on Judith. (UBS Helps for Translators). New York: UBS, 2001. For this and other handbooks for translators see here.