As noted at verse 11, if another section heading is included, it should be here and not at verse 11. A suitable heading would be “The LORD will restore his people” (compare Jerusalem Bible/New Jerusalem Bible, Good News Translation) or “The LORD will bring his people back home.”
Return to your stronghold: The Hebrew word translated stronghold occurs only here in the Old Testament. Some scholars doubt whether the text is correct, but it makes acceptable sense and there is no need to change it. The same Hebrew root is used in Isa 22.10, where it refers to fortifying the walls of Jerusalem. Here the stronghold, “fortress” (New American Bible, New International Version, New Jerusalem Bible, Contemporary English Version), or “Citadel” (Revised English Bible) is an area fortified as a “place of safety” (Good News Translation), and is generally understood to refer to Jerusalem.
O prisoners of hope: This expression is so short that it sounds obscure in English. In some languages the vocative expression (term of address) O prisoners … will need to come at the beginning of the verse, as in Bible en français courant and Parola Del Signore: La Bibbia in Lingua Corrente. The meaning of prisoners of hope is “prisoners in exile who have retained hope in God” or “… who have been hoping that God will free you,” and in many languages the translation will need to be expanded enough to make the meaning clear. Good News Translation has “you exiles who now have hope,” though the Hebrew text does not justify the inclusion of “now.” Revised English Bible “you captives waiting in hope” is perhaps better (compare New Jerusalem Bible). Some translators may prefer to say “you prisoners who have not hoped in vain” (compare Die Bibel im heutigen Deutsch, 1. Edition).
Today I declare that I will restore to you double: The word today is emphasized in Hebrew. The speaker (I) is still the LORD. The word translated restore is a form of the same Hebrew root translated Return at the beginning of the verse. New American Bible uses “return” both times in English, but this is not very natural. In some languages it may be possible to keep this wordplay, but in many it will be lost. I will restore to you double sounds incomplete in English, where we would expect something added to explain what is doubled. This expression is often compared with the thought of Isa 40.2, where Jerusalem receives double punishment for her sins. Here by contrast she is promised a double blessing for all her suffering, probably meaning that the population of Jerusalem will be doubled. Many translators will find it helpful to follow the example of Good News Translation: “I will repay you twice over with blessing for all you have suffered.” However, in some languages translators will need to make the notion of a doubling of the population clear; for example, “I will make you twice as populous [or, double your population] because of all the things you have suffered” or “I will give you twice as many people to make up for how you have suffered.” Gaide compares the thought of this passage with that of Hos 2.15, where the people of Israel are offered “a door of hope” after their experience of trouble. See also Isa 61.7.
An alternative translation model for this verse keeping the poetic structure is:
• Return, you prisoners in foreign lands,
who have been hoping that God will free you.
Because today I will give you twice as many people [or, I will bless you greatly],
because of all the things you have suffered.
Quoted with permission from Clark, David J. & Hatton, Howard A. A Handbook on Zechariah. (UBS Helps for Translators). New York: UBS, 2002. For this and other handbooks for translators see here .