I arose in the night renders the Hebrew very literally. This is a very succinct way of describing Nehemiah’s next action. Good News Translation offers more detail by translating “I got up and went out,” while Contemporary English Version is even more explicit with “I got up during the night and left my house.” Translators should take care to be sure that the narrative account makes sense to the reader or listener, but they should not make explicit more detail than is necessary. New International Version renders it “I set out during the night” and New English Bible is similar with “I set out by night.”

I and a few men with me: This is the Hebrew order of syntax, but to repeat it in English is awkward. Therefore, Good News Translation restructures it, saying “taking a few of my companions with me.” Contemporary English Version states it in even more simple English: “I took some men with me.” For the first sentence in this verse, some languages will use a pattern that may be similar to the Hebrew, such as “I arose in the night and went out with a few men.”

I told no one what my God had put into my heart to do for Jerusalem: Nehemiah felt that God had put into his heart what he had planned (see Ezra 7.27). He felt that he was led by God to what he was to do. God “had inspired” (Good News Translation) him, “was prompting” (New English Bible) him, or “had put the thoughts into his heart about what he should do for Jerusalem.” He told no one. He did not inform anyone of his intentions so that those opposed to his plans could not stop him before he was ready to put them into action. Some translators may do as Good News Translation has done in placing this sentence at the beginning of the verse to indicate the chronological order of events. Nehemiah kept his plan a secret; then he got up and went out with a few men to inspect the wall.

There was no beast with me but the beast on which I rode: The animal he rode was a load-carrying animal, possibly a donkey, mule, or horse. Among the men in the survey party, only Nehemiah was mounted. Good News Translation considers that Nehemiah’s animal was most likely a donkey and translates accordingly (also Bible en français courant). However, to remain faithful to the text, it is preferable to use a general term for a load-carrying animal as Revised Standard Version has done (also Nouvelle version Segond révisée, Traduction œcuménique de la Bible), instead of specifying a particular animal.

Quoted with permission from Noss, Philip A. and Thomas, Kenneth J. A Handbook on Nehemiah. (UBS Helps for Translators). New York: UBS, 2005. For this and other handbooks for translators see here .