Then: Since this verse begins a conclusion to this part of the story, Contemporary English Version translates the common Hebrew conjunction here with the transition word “Finally.”
If not: More of what is implied in these words may have to be provided in translation. One possible model would be the following: “If you will not accept the gift[s] I am offering you.”
I pray you: This renders the same Hebrew particle that is translated “now” in verses 8 and 15. See the discussion under those verses. New Revised Standard Version and Contemporary English Version provide a more modern rendering, saying “please.”
Let there be given to your servant …: This very awkward clause in English reflects an equally awkward construction in the original text and contains problems related to both form and meaning. First, there is the passive form let there be given. Second, there is the use of the indirect reference, your servant, showing courtesy and respect. The passive form may be easily transformed into a request using an active construction. And the indirect reference may be made direct, using the first person singular pronoun “me.” The resulting translation would then be something like “give me….” It will be noted that the indirect reference, your servant, is used a second time later in this verse. The personal pronoun should probably be used in that case as well.
Two mules’ burden of earth: New Jerusalem Bible rightly translates “as much earth as two mules may carry.” The reader will almost certainly wonder why Naaman makes such an odd request. Naaman’s request assumes that the God of Israel can be worshiped only in the land of Israel. In those translations where footnotes are used, it will be possible to explain the situation in some detail. The following footnote is a possible model: “The soil of the land of Israel was considered holy and Naaman proposed to erect an altar to God on it in his hometown. He expressly asked permission from the prophet so that there be no suggestion of theft or dishonesty involved in his project. This request is in contrast with his earlier attitude regarding the waters of Israel [verse 12].” But in cases where translators are not using footnotes, it will be legitimate to include in translation a statement about the purpose of the earth that would be transported to Syria; for example, “as much earth as two mules can carry so that I may build an altar on it and worship on ground from Israel.” Although this is implied in the request, it requires considerable explanation. So the use of a footnote is preferable.
Henceforth your servant will not offer … to any god but the LORD: This construction is somewhat awkward and may be difficult to imitate in other languages. The indirect reference, your servant, should be replaced by a first person singular pronoun in most cases. The strong negative statement (henceforth your servant will not offer … to any god) followed by the exception clause (but the LORD) may be replaced by a positive statement, such as “from now on I will offer burnt offerings and sacrifices only to the LORD.”
Regarding the Hebrew noun translated burnt offering, see the comments on 1 Kgs 3.4 and 2 Kgs 3.27. The Hebrew noun translated sacrifice refers to a sacrifice of slaughtered sheep, goats or cattle to create communion between God and the people offering the sacrifice and between the people themselves. Some translations use the expression “peace offering” or “communion sacrifice” (Bible en français courant) since this Hebrew noun often refers to this specific kind of offering.
Quoted with permission from Omanson, Roger L. and Ellington, John E. A Handbook on 1-2 Kings, Volume 2. (UBS Helps for Translators). New York: UBS, 2008. For this and other handbooks for translators see here .