He gave them into subjection to all the kingdoms around us …: These two verses present a problem in that the discourse shifts from first person plural, which has been consistently used since the beginning of the confession in 1.15, to the third person. There is logic in this, since this confession is supposed to be used by the people in Jerusalem, and so far the historical references have been to Jerusalem. In these two verses, however, the focus shifts to the exiles; these people would of course be referred to as “they” by those still in Jerusalem. But the reader will need some help. Good News Translation translates the pronouns them and They in two places by “our people” and “our nation.” This is a good solution, which is also followed in essence by New English Bible and Contemporary English Version. But even Good News Translation has a problem, since the pronoun “us,” which it uses in verse 4, shifts the focus and is a bit confusing (also Contemporary English Version). We note that New American Bible gives up any effort to preserve a distinction between the Jerusalem community and the exiles, and simply renders every occurrence as “we,” “us,” or “our.” It certainly simplifies things. We recommend that translators follow New American Bible. See the alternative translation model below.
A reproach and a desolation: The Greek word rendered reproach means to “insult” or even “cause to lose face.” For desolation the Greek uses an unusual word that means “inaccessible” or “impassable.” Compare its use in Wis 5.7 (“trackless deserts”) or Lev 16.22 (“solitary land”). The reference here is to the thinly populated land of Judah. This happened at the beginning of the exile when many of the people were forced to leave the land. This verse is probably modeled after Jer 25.18 (32.18 in Greek), Jer 42.18 (49.18 in Greek), or Jer 44.22 (51.22 in Greek).
Where the Lord has scattered them: This means “where the Lord has caused them to go in all directions”; or the clause may be alternatively expressed as “The Lord let our enemies take us into many countries” (see the model below).
They were brought low and not raised up …: A question here is whether the word and joins two consecutive events (the exiles were abased/put to shame and have not been restored to pride) or whether it joins two opposing ideas (the exiles were conquered instead of being victorious). Most take it in the second of these senses. How translators handle brought low and not raised up will depend on whether they are trying to keep the reference in the Greek to the exiled community. With reference to the exiles, “put to shame [or, captured] and did not gain freedom” is appropriate. With reference to Jerusalem, Good News Translation “conquered, instead of being victorious” is fitting. Translators would be justified in maintaining the author’s distinction between Jerusalem and the exiles in verse 4 and dissolving it into a general “we” in this verse, since here what is said of the exiled community is also true of Jerusalem. In any case, the pronoun we is very inclusive in the last half of this verse (because we sinned against the Lord our God, in not heeding his voice). Both Jerusalem and the exiles sinned against God. Good News Translation expresses this well with “We sinned against the Lord our God and refused to obey him.”
An alternative translation model for verses 4-5 is:
• The Lord let our enemies take us into many countries where the peoples around us [inclusive] ruled over us. There they looked on us with disgust and treated us as something horrible. We sinned against the Lord our God by refusing to obey him. So, instead of conquering our enemies, they defeated us.
Quoted with permission from Bullard, Roger A. and Hatton, Howard A. A Handbook on The Shorter Books of the Deuterocanon. (UBS Helps for Translators). New York: UBS, 2006. For this and other handbooks for translators see here.